This is what it costs

This is what it costs

 “This is what it costs!” was the expected answer whenever I wanted something. 

“Mom, can I get this comic book?” I’d ask.

“This is what it costs?” she’d ask with a questioning glance as she gazed at the price tag on the cover. This was usually followed by, “And who’s going to pay for it?”

 At this point, I knew it was useless to continue. The answer that that question inevitably would turn out to be me. 

The internal question that I had to ask myself, was then, “Do I really want that comic book?” Though the answer in my head was yes, I was beginning to understand that purchasing said comic book, meant I was that much poorer in the money to spend account. 

Occasionally when my mother wasn’t around and I was with friends, money wasn’t an issue. Distraction and thievery worked more efficiently. It wasn’t my fault that the comic books were close to the door of the store. I only resorted to that once or twice and could never take the said item home for fear of being caught. 

When weighing the non-monetary cost versus the guilt that I felt for doing something bad, guilt always won out. And still does today. 

As I grew older, “This is what it costs?” became more of an angry question/statement than an inquisitive one. I wanted to purchase some Air Jordan sneakers. I’d look in the store window and “ARE YOU KIDDING ME, THIS IS WHAT IT COSTS? ” Needless to say, no purchase was made. Converse or Keds would have to do.

Now that I’m an adult, “This is what it costs.” comes out more as a blah statement of fact. Usually, it is appended with the words “on this site”. As we all know you can’t just shop at one store or website to buy anything. Yes, you can get a lot on Amazon, and shop at major shopping clubs such as Cosco, and B.J.s, but before you can purchase anything, you need to know you’re getting the best price. You can also use Apps such as Honey to price search for you, which is probably why the saying is now, “This is what it costs on …” 

Finances usually not being an issue, which they were as a child and young adult, this means your decisions are not cut and dry anymore. When you were young, if you didn’t want to spend the money, you just didn’t purchase the item. “This is the price” – “Yes” or “No”.

Now, unfortunately, because there are so many ways to get what you want, at so many different prices, you can’t make up your mind. What used to be a simple cost/item/place to purchase decision, becomes an endless search for answers. No wonder so many people today, me included, have trouble making everyday decisions. 

All I can say is that this is what you get with progress. Things become easier to produce, it should be easier to accomplish tasks, it’s certainly easier to pay for things, and acquire the best that you can buy for less; however, having gotten to that point it takes you more time to decide. And as my mom used to say, “This is what it costs.”