Steering the Craft – Sentence/Paragraph exercise

This is a continuation of the exercises from the Ursula K. Le Guin’s book, Steering the Craft: Exercises and Discussions on Story Writing for the Lone Navigator or the Mutinous Crew

Part one of this assignment was to write a paragraph of narrative, 100-150 words, in sentences of seven or fewer words. Each sentence must have a subject and a verb.

Sitting at my writer’s desk and looking out my window this is what I saw:

A woodpecker sits on the feeder. It is outside my balcony window. It has a red head. It is searching for bits of food. There is not much food left for it. A squirrel pauses on the ground. It looks up at the woodpecker. It must decide soon. Should I try or not? Though tempting, there is a cage. The cage protects the food. The woodpecker leaves. The squirrel advances. Cage or not it will eat. As it climbs it surveys obstacles. Poking through the cage it tries. It does not get much seed. The woodpecker was not a neat eater. It was very picky. Much of the food was tossed aside. “Aside” means it landed on the ground. Looking down the squirrel notices something. There is more food on the ground. It would be much easier to get. Squirrels appear to have little brains. They also perseverate. It continues to try the cage.

Part two was a lot harder. Write a half-page of narrative, up to 350 words, which is all one sentence.

The reason it is harder is that I’m not familiar with enough grammar rules and punctuation to note where extending the passage becomes a run-on. I would naturally break my paragraph up into much smaller units.

This passage I’m writing about would fit into my story “Dora and the Jade of Knowledge”:

Weary with travel, Bryan, Tyler and Will, glanced over the great plain of Incha as it lie before them, covered with partial clumps of grasses, encompassing a view that completely covered the horizon, with the exception of a winding river, the river Wiser, who’s torrents created a startling contrast to the scene before them; Bryan being concerned about the possible conflicts involving finding the jade and remaining healthy and safe; Tyler, ever impulsive, just looking for places to go and things that he just wanted to do right now; and Will, who just took in vastness and beauty of it all with its mystery and hope of finding the jade and fulfillment; None of them knowing what clues they would find and just what was in store for them as they continued in their quest for the Jade of Knowledge, the hand of the Princess Dora, and the kingdom which each felt they were entitled.

Not close to 350 words, but more than any sentence I’ve written in the past.